How To Win Friends and Influence People

Hello Sanctuary NYC Friends,

In 1937, Dale Carnegie wrote a book called How To Win Friends and Influence People. My dad was a big fan of the Dale Carnegie course, and working its principles helped him become very successful in business. My dad was a real seeker. When I was twelve, he gave me the book Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz. Heavy lifting for a twelve year old, but by then I had already discovered the complete works of Sigmund Freud on my dad’s bookshelf, and was trying to figure that out.
My family was the model they used to define the term “Dysfunctional.” I mean, we were one of the families. I don’t want to be grandiose. In truth, when I was younger, everybody was walking around trying to pretend to be all together, and honestly, that was the hardest part of growing up for me. At least if you know that other people’s families are as crazy as yours then it doesn’t feel quite so bad.
Lately, I have been looking over those early tomes, along with some great new works such as Eight Habits of Love by Ed Bacon, and of course the life story of Diana Vreeland in numerous forms. You think I jest? I have seen the Diana Vreeland documentary “The Eye Has to Travel,” three times already. Why you may ask?
What I see in the amazingly interesting life of Diana Vreeland is the triumphant healing power of art and positive thinking over what could have been seen as very difficult circumstances. Looked at with the knowledge we now have about narcissistic and alcoholic parents, the subplot of her life may be a touch nightmarish. I am honestly more interested in how Mrs. Vreeland’s incredible resilience gave her the ability to create beauty and a cultural lens for a generation through looking at fashion.
She saw that fashion predicts all kinds of things, including war and the coming of a new age, and the changing of lifestyles. And she celebrated creativity in everything ranging from Mick Jagger to leopards. I must say I agree with her when she says, “I mean a world without leopards! Who needs it?”
Cultivating relationships is also an art, and Dale Carnegie reminds us that finding the creative spark in all of life’s expressions around us is what it is all about. He was the original “Say Yes!!” guy. Oh no, maybe that was Jesus, who said, “If you DO these things I do, greater things than these will YOU DO.”
It’s about what we DO, and how we treat one another, and how we look at the glass. It is always both half empty AND half full, but the empty part can be used to propel us into full engagement with the full part.
Our themes for the month of December are Creativity and Love.

Come create with us.
We love to see your face.

Peace/out,
Rev. Jane

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